On this fourth Sunday of Lent we have read and listened to one of the greatest passages in all of Scripture, “For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him might not perish but might have eternal life.” (Jn. 3:16, NABRE) Often times we will see signs at the ball games that read 3:16 and often enough we hear it spoken by Evangelists, preachers, and priests. It is God reminding us that he loves us. It is that love that makes us whole and holy. It is a love that pierces right through the heart. This love gives us happiness in God. It also has another effect; it also sheds light on any darkness in our lives.
After the greatest words spoken to man of God loving the world, John the Evangelist writes, “…the light came into the world, but people prefer darkness to light, because their works were evil. For everyone who does wicked things hates the light, so that his works might not be exposed.” (Jn. 3:19-20, NABRE) These words had unbelievers in mind; those who refused to believe in God and would rather live in sin. Yet, the words are for us in some manner as well. All of us are guilty of sin - everyone single one of us. “If we say, “we are without sin,” we deceive ourselves, and the Truth is not in us.” (1 Jn. 1:8, NABRE) St. Paul also tells us, “All have gone astray, all alike are worthless; there is not one who does good, there is not even one.” (Rom. 3:12, NABRE)
Last week, I spoke about man’s wounded nature, the part of us that sometimes leads us to sin when we give in to that sinful nature. We give into it because we feel it brings us happiness; yes, happiness. All sin is disguised as something good, something pleasurable, and every sin has its roots in pride. Pride is that inordinate desire to be greater than one really is, i.e. to become our own gods. Therefore, whether the sin is one of greed, lust, wrath, jealousy, etc., it stems from pride.
The symbol of darkness, as the John the Evangelist employs throughout his Gospel, takes on a few meanings. Two, in particular, are that darkness is a means for hiding a particular sin or sins; and darkness being ignorance, not being fully aware of the Light or Truth. When we sin, as I said, we usually do so because we feel that it brings us happiness that we deserve. Let’s take a look at some sins in which that is obvious.
If we examine adultery, (I guess I’m picking a big one here – I could have gone lighter but I’m trying to make a point), the person usually engages in the act because he or she believes they have a right to it. They are seeking happiness for whatever reason. They might feel that they deserve this experience and they justify it in their minds by whatever means necessary. One is in darkness here on the two levels that I spoke of: 1) the person who committed the act of adultery does not want to be found out, therefore the act itself is wrong and evil – being hidden in the darkness; 2) there is also the possibility of ignorance concerning the act; the person may truly think there is nothing wrong with it. Their conscience has been numbed, and that is only for God to judge.
Another sin we examine is greed. This one comes into play during tax season. The sin comes from pride and is usually reasoned out this way: The Government has taken enough from me. It’s time to get what I deserve, to get some back. Therefore, we fudge a little bit here, a little bit there, the whole time justifying our actions because we feel someone else has cheated us. Again, we are in the darkness, for we are not being honest and we definitely do not want to be exposed to the Light as we would then owe some back taxes.
One final example is the sin of wrath or vengeance. I did not choose anger because anger is not always a sin. But once it morphs into rage, wrath, or vengeance then it has become a sin. We allow ourselves to fall into this from time to time because we take justice into our own hands and become the arbiters of that justice. Though God may ask for mercy, we are far from it in terms of being merciful. This can be not only with enemies but those within our own family. We will hold onto grudges, non-forgiveness, for years as a means of holding something over someone, a form of punishment against the other. The darkness here is that we are blind to the Truth and the Light. We are self-justified in our wrath: even God himself has taken our side, at least that is what we believe in our minds. Satan has twisted the lie into the truth and we allowed our wounded nature to overcome the nature of grace given by God, which God not only asks that we forgive but He actually makes it a command vital to eternal life. “Whoever says he is in the light, yet hates his brother, is still in the darkness. Whoever loves his brother remains in the light, and there is nothing in him to cause a fall. Whoever hates his brother is in darkness; he walks in darkness and does not know where he is going because the darkness has blinded his eyes.” (1 Jn. 2:9-11, NABRE) And from the Gospel of Matthew Jesus says, “If you forgive others their transgressions, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you do not forgive others, neither will your Father forgive your transgressions.” (Mt. 6:14-15, NABRE)
This Lent, I have been focusing on our wounded nature and devoting time to why we sin and its repercussions. The immediate repercussion is that sin actually makes us unhappy. But like a vicious cycle, we return to it to ease the pain of the previous sin. Our passions sometimes get the best of us. Jesus knew this and that is why he came so that he might help us with our wounded nature. He wants to heal it through and through. The toughest things about Lent are admitting that I am a sinner, admitting that I sometimes harm relationships by being choosing selfish acts, that sometimes I hold onto bitterness and I am not quick to forgive, that I sometimes cheat and feel that I deserve to do so. The hardest thing about Christianity is TRUTH - truth about oneself with all our foibles, idiosyncrasies, weaknesses, and sins.
Walking with Jesus in the desert for these forty days is not just about giving up meat on Fridays, or candy or soda. Anybody can do that. Those are just simple forms of penance to help us realize the deeper truths of who I am before God. We go into this hot and dry desert without water or anything else along with Jesus so that we can learn from him and, also, to let go of everything because you can’t carry much in desert; you have to leave it behind. Therefore, as we are in the 2nd half of our journey in the desert, let us finish strong: as many basketball coaches would say to their players, “Leave your hearts on the floor this half, give it everything.” Jesus wants to bring us light so that we are whole, holy, and happy, but we can’t be afraid of the Light and exposing the dark part of ourselves, for it brings healing. There may be initial pain, sorrow, and regret, but with forgiveness come peace, joy, and the lifting of a heavy burden. The sin of pride is always directed toward self; the virtue of grace (and mercy) is always directed outwards because it always makes us happier to serve than to be served. Come towards the Light - do not be afraid, for it is your God who calls.
Fr. John Picinic
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